Guardian
by Cat Dawntreader
Summary: Old and new stories archived, all involving the guardians in one way or another. Newer stories will be uploaded as first chapters. [Implied YueXSakura]
1. Snowglobes

**A/N:** Sera, Lunazu, and Soleda are my characters in this sort-of AU piece. Takes place many years into the future.

* * *

He lived in a world as perfect as its creator.

His domain was night eternity. Crescent, full, half, eclipsed, or whichever moon his mind reflected, it hung in a sky of a deep blue found beneath the sea, where daylight could not stay. When it tolerated light, it came in thin gold threads, aching to weave into a full day. It never did.

His star - _his mistress_ - had gifted him a world unto his own. He had always had one, she had explained, in his heart and in his head. It made him aloof to the world they shared. This was one where he was completely free.

With time, he had opened the figurative door to his brother and soon after fifty-plus members joined, to live as free and splendidly, unbound from their magic seals. _No one should live in a cold prison of magic, _she said.

At least not alone.

The moon guardian lay in the field, as he often did. Sometimes his wings itched to fly, and he flew to the edge of the world, where it tapered off into nothingness. The world seemed so real. It was easy to forget its end was truly there. Tonight he enjoyed Voice, Song and Glow who filled the air with music and dancing lights from afar. It was somebody's birthday – it was so every night. There was no use to explaining to anthropomorphic creature, that birthdays were an annual occurrence. "Birthdays or non-birthdays, why would you ever question a party?" Kero had once quipped. He stopped. He would much rather enjoy the blithe insanity of his companions from a distance than the dull solitude of a lonely existence.

Everything was perfect, as perfect as it could be without Sakura.

Like clockwork, his night blue was temporarily disturbed by a glowing light, a gold star scarring its brilliant path into the false earth.

A young woman came through the star path she forged with the magic in her blood, forming, reforming, from the falling sparks. The entrance was beautiful, but to Yue, it was a tiresome display that beget nuisance. The star was familiar, could fool human eyes. However, there was only one of her, the true _her. _

"I'm going back again," Sera said, before her feet touched the ground. Her long hair, flailed in the air before settling in a brown mess behind a thin silver hair band adorned with small green crystals. They did not bring out her eyes, the way it did her mother's, but she wore the heirloom with utmost pride.

He turned to where only a vacant field and a lake pooled in the distance. Beyond there were hints of forest and a home built more like an ancient castle in ivory-colored stone, with cracks and aging effects perfectly incorporated into its cold magnificence. "Let it go."

Return came, to fulfill the ritual the young magician put him through on a biweekly basis. Her long robe was unresponsive to the wind that disturbed the space amongst them all. She cradled the blue clock close, but as she neared, the clock's small wings awoke. They fluttered as the hands moved counterclockwise, and it lifted from her hold to fly toward Sera. Return halted and returned to join her enchanted siblings.

Sera welcomed the winged clock into her arms, as a mother would a baby. A long time ago, it should have been so, he mused, Sera holding her own infant daughter or son, to continue her strong lineage of magic. It could still happen if she saw beyond her own needs, to consider the end of their own lives, entwined in her lifeline. However, the existence of this place assured them all they had a home, and no time soon would they be sealed away in a book to be forgotten again. Sakura had foreseen the future, or perhaps, meant for her daughter to choose her own destiny.

Yue grimaced. "We can't take your memories away from you, but they bring you so much misery. Why do you torture yourself with the past?"

"You did once as well. Didn't you wish you could stop him from passing away?" She turned the face of the excited clock so that it looked into hers.

"Clow Reed did what he wanted. He brought us to this moment. Syaoran has been gone for over thirty years. You had a lifetime with him, _his_ specifically, but it was a lifetime." Yue continued, "We need to find your mother."

Her ears reddened. _I don't want to talk about her_, usually followed as a response to his prodding. She glanced up quickly. Sera clawed her fingers into her hair, a quirk of exasperation. "My mother's been gone for only a year, but she left me long before then. My father, he didn't have a natural alternative."

Tonight she would take the other path. Yue sighed.

"He chose his human death. Your mother offered salvation with magic." Her eyes flared at his selection of words. He oft forgot the humanity in her, invoked by making light of Syaoran's final years of his disease; _cancer_, the word made Sera's eyes well up with anger and loss. "Your mother's reasons for leaving are unclear, but so were my last master's. They do what they think is right…what they make of the future. As _you_ are supposed to do now."

Her expression changed, becoming full of the nostalgia that Yue equated with danger. "My parents love for each other it was almost magical, wasn't it? They were one soul, one heart. I was just a little, forgettable afterthought."

Yue motioned downhill. "Look out there… what do you see?" Beyond them, was the magical family he had known his entire life, and a pair of new guardians. Keroberos played with Soleda, teasing the white leopard that she was the slowest sun guardian he had ever met, but as least had amazing bat wings. Lunazu, the golden-curled moon guardian stood up and smiled at her. Her eyes looked worried, as they often did at the presence of her mistress. She waved at Sera, who acknowledged her with a nod. Tonight Lunazu did not appear brave enough to join them, wearing a pink dress more appropriate for the festivity. Flower filled her arms with moon flowers and The Wind sent them swirling to lightly shower Yue and Sera. The white star-shaped flowers bloomed open around them and fell like a cool snow. "They care for you. Your guardians love you."

The clock circled around them, chasing after flowers. Sera caught a blossom as it slowly drifted to the ground. The rest were swept up to rain down on her again with a little help from magic.

She covered the moon flower with both her hands and whispered into it, and then reopened to reveal a different white blossom that soon overtook her hands. This one possessed an elaborate display of petals, round and delicate around its yellow stigma and styles, while thinner longer ones in its circumference formed a wreath. "The Brahma Kamal," Sera explained, "my favorite flower. I learned about it in China from my father. Did you know it only blooms at a night and withers in less than an hour?"

"I can ask Flower to plant you a garden of them. One that doesn't whither and always blooms." Had he heard himself offer her flowers? How asinine.

She smiled and looked about. He had also forgotten for a brief moment the living snowglobe they stood in.

Sera curtsied at the party, and caught a sugary kiss from Sweet, and then the flowers became as sweet as well. She bit into the white lotus, tasting flaky pastry with a maple-flavored center. Yue had seen this before, knowing it always touched her heart to see them remember the things that brought her joy as a child. Sometimes she herself forgot, so Yue took it upon himself to set up her visits with such immaculate efficiency to make her covet realness, for happiness beyond this world. Even if it was as small as a dessert from her mother's favorite sweet shop. Sera always fought him, breaking through the haze of any enchanting reverie with a magic that came from heartache.

"My memories of him are like snowglobes. When the snow settles, all I want is to flip it over and start over again. I want to be in that moment forever, in that bubble. Static, beautiful." She closed and reopened her hands again, producing a glass orb, which shimmered and glowed with metallic snow over a foggy scene, its inhabitants indistinct.

"Snowglobes are toys for children, not a magic spell for you to play with others. Magic has consequences, of which you've failed to learn." Yue had not meant to sound as crude.

Sera dispelled the flowers, sending them flying in all directions, as if to show him how much of a child she could be. She did not possess the graceful control Sakura achieved with many years of practice. "Did you love my mother?" The question surprised him, although it should not have. Sera was prone to asking personal questions.

"Not at first, and not for a very long time."

"When did you know you loved her?" The orb flickered, to an image of a winged plush yellow animal with shiny black eyes that sparkled with life. An infant girl held him in her arms, a rounded perk ear in her mouth.

The question required a careful answer, to be dissected for all the meaning it may have. "The day she married your father."

A small hand reaching for a photograph her parents on that event, on what her father called his second favorite day of his life. Sera did not ask him what was his most favorite, or who it was. She already knew.

"When did you stop?"

Yue did not answer. Sera eyes teared up. The orb flicked to a graduation. She had not earned top place in class, but a young man with fair skin and gentle amethyst eyes did. His stunning mother, beamed with her camera, as he spoke of the future. He had glanced at Sera more times than at the camera or the rest of his audience.

"You need to spend more time with your human friends. He is good for you. He looks at you with worship."

"Someday they'll die, and I'll be lonely like my mother. It can't be right." She tugged at the star pendant around her slender neck. "Can I not spend the rest of my life with you and the other guardians and the cards here?"

"You are still young. You must enjoy your human life for as long as you can." He had forgotten her true age. It could have easily been past seventy or eighty, but her features were youthful much like her behavior. She was not his ward, but she was hardly competent to lead guardians beyond hers.

Sera whispered, "Why can't you leave with me? Are you not my guardian?"

"Lunazu and Soleda are your first guardians, Sera. They shall be with you on that side." She had sought their advice less and less with time. Yue had placed some responsibility onto himself, for answering all her questions rather than teaching her guardians not to be afraid of her. "I cannot leave this place. I miss your mother too much," he said.

Sera wrapped a hand around his arm, which tensed at her touch. "Don't you wish you could have told her? Maybe she would have never left this world… to know that someone else loved her as much as my father…"

He looked out faraway. "She lived a long and happy life and she hoped that for you as well." Her mother's looks crept into Sera's features at times, in the flecks of green suddenly noticeable in her hazel eyes. Yue longed to reach out to her and not let her go, but Sera's smile always brought him back to reality. Sakura smiled without reservation, with her entire heart, whereas her daughter's smile was uneven and held back a secret. He did not care to know what it was.

"You're right," she said.

Yue looked at her in disbelief, seeking the lie in the warm color of her eyes, which seem to ease into the color of pine in spring. "It's uncanny of you to agree with me."

"I love you." Her eyes flashed a full green perceptively.

He tilted her chin, examining the familiar shape of her face. "You need to let go. I'll be here when you truly need me."

Sera tip-toed, having inherited Sakura's small frame, pulling him down with great force. The star pendant winked up at him. She spoke the word as she let him go: "return," bringing her back into her favorite snowglobe.

They were in that place again, a day in the life of her parents. In the place of glittering snow, was brilliant spring, verdant and… _perfect. _She smiled at him. It was wrong, crooked, devious, hiding something behind its pretty phase. She knew that it hurt him to see her mother blissful with someone else, as if the reality would make him forget about her. It only made him remember more.

Yue hated this place, he hated the past. Only ugly thoughts remained there, slithering their way to the present. He lifted Sera and carried her, seeking an escape. In these flashbacks, he had requested from Return to leave a mark. The blue clock would wait for them somewhere, and he only needed to touch its face to come back to his world.

"We cannot keep doing this. You cannot change anything here," he said. Fifty feet away or so, the blue clock shone.

"I loved her, and she left me." Yue could feel her breathing change, dreading the weeping that neared with every word. He was terrible at consolation.

Sera gazed up at him now, as he spoke quietly, "She left _us_."

"Why can't you love me?"

He did not have an answer, nor dared look at her. Had Sera expected him to fall for her as he had his previous masters? How arrogant of her, to want more than his loyalty which even that was toilsome to give and test continually.

"Mirror…" And she became her, Sakura. But her smile was not the same.

Yue set her down, letting her walk along him. "Stop it." His teeth were gritted. He glared at the clock ahead, but his silver cat eyes had widened and he had to glimpse at her.

"Does this make you happy?"

"It irritates me." His pupils remained dilated, wanting to take in more of Sakura.

"Mirror." She became Clow Reed.

Yue could feel an ache building inside of him, one he had long buried and forgotten. He shook the false magician, unable to bring the real Clow back or Sera into logic. Yue had to be brash, spontaneous. It was the only way to win this game. So he kissed her, until her auburn hair flowed out and the girl's figure filled his hands.

"You've never…"

"Don't let me regret it." He grabbed her hand and they walked across the park. "Let's go home."

Sera caught the familiar sight of her father presenting a diamond ring to her mother, beneath a cherry tree with a history that touched them all. It was a bit extravagant in its size and setting, but neither could deny its beauty. Syaoran had spoken of the piece to Tomoyo, who proudly thought she understood Sakura's jewelry and fashion taste better than anyone else. It was Keroberos, who somehow knew everything about everyone, who broke the news to Yue a fortnight to this day. For two weeks he avoided his then-mistress, and when he returned to her, she was somebody else's.

"We didn't miss the best part," Yue muttered. Her face blushed when he looked back to her. "Sera?"

"Yes?"

"I also keep a snowglobe." He touched the clock, letting the hands spin wildly forward to the present moment. "Some moments were meant to last forever."

Sera laughed and faded before he could bring her back into his world.

Yue was amidst the celebration. Return stood beside him and took back her blue clock. Its face froze so that time stood still, appropriate for a place in which night never left.

"How is she, Yue?" Lunazu asked. Her golden hair hung in lazy curls on her shoulders. Her amber eyes looked worrisome. Soleda was belly up in the cool ground, purring and pawing at a giggling Cloud. The four o' clocks that adorned her cloudy hair and grew in patches nearby bloomed.

"Nine on the dot," Time announced, as if it mattered.

Rain plucked a flower out of her sister's hair and sniffed it. "You're always late."

"They don't get enough light in here," Light said, furrowing her eyebrows at Yue.

"I know, but I was talking to Yue," Rain explained. "He doesn't like being around us too much."

The Voice sang an aria with the borrowed vocals of Dark, quickly joined by Song.

Yue did not respond but walked away. Lunazu followed. He continued until they were distant enough from inquisitive ears. "The same. Heartbroken."

"She only laughs with you." There was a slight jealous tone in her honey voice. "I would die happy to bring out that kind of joy out of her." Yue could see there was more than a need to bring Sera happiness in her expression. Lunazu wanted to be loved by her. He was relieved that she only heard Sera's laughter, and not seen his tactics that elicited the delightful sound.

Lunazu continued, "She speaks of you so fondly, her favorite moon guardian. Sakura should not have made me when Sera clearly has no need for my protection or my company."

"She loves you and Soleda as Sakura loved Keroberos and I." It was true, but the moon guardians longed to be loved more. He wondered if Ruby Moon secretly loved Eriol with such devotion, or had her heartless nature been real. If so, Eriol was the kindest creator of them all.

"It's not enough for me." She twirled slowly, and bowed. "Your master could have built me a little less lovelorn... or more to her daughter's taste." Her extended arm reached out to him, requesting a dance. Before Yue could kindly decline, she straightened her posture. "She's calling me. Hmm… I'll see you soon, Yue." Lunazu closed her eyes and faded in golden smoke.

"Keep an eye on her. She's very… impulsive." Yue warned before the plumes blew gone completely.

Yue picked up a snowglobe with his moments, as if plucking an invisible apple out of nothing. He shook it gently, the metallic snow glowed. He had spared Lunazu the truth of her creation. Could she forgive him?

A small voice spoke, _"__I'm still working on my surprise for Kero, but I couldn't keep this one from you any longer." Sakura stepped aside, to reveal a small child with pretty curls and copper reptilian eyes which shifted into red, as she curiously touched Sakura's coat. "__Do you like her? I made her with you in mind__." The child's eyes flashed blue at the sight of him, and she grew taller into an adult version of Lunazu that mirrored his long white hair and feline gaze._

_"She's a lovely chameleon. Does she change on her own?" _

_"The final version won't._ _That's just one of the several glitches I'm patching up. I'm trying to instill false memories of Sera and you, but it is taking more time than I have. Sera's anxious to meet her new guardians and introduce them to her favorite playthings."_

_"Don't bother with mine. She only needs to bond with Sera. I'll have to earn her respect the old-fashioned way."_

_"With your infamous charm?" _

He won her over as a mentor, and she grew to be more of like his sister than she felt to Sera. By cutting him out of her inner wiring, Sakura had over-enhanced Lunazu's love for Sera, which grew more and more with time. Her mistress became her everything.

Lunazu was more like Yue than anybody planned.

Yue shook the orb again, changing to another memory. This one he visited often, as if each visit would answer questions long past asking.

"Would you like to live it this time?" Return asked. She had startled him, thinking himself alone.

"Not tonight," he said.

Return nodded. "It would be nice for you to join us sometime, Yue."

The Wood built a tree for him, heavily branched for a bit of privacy. Yue rested on a leafy throne of sorts, overseeing his home. "He will. Don't keep us waiting." With that, they left him.

In his orb, a young woman with green eyes takes his hands in hers.

"I want you to live a happy life. Yukito's human life has passed to join my brother in eternity. You are free, Yue. You are no longer bound to me," Sakura said.

His tone was unwavering in its incredulity. "Have you grown tired of my company?"

"No, my dear friend. I've lost so many people in my long life. I don't want to force my time on you."

"I will be with you forever." He held her hand to his face and kissed it.

Her lips became a line and her eyelids blinked too quickly. "I used to think Syaoran and I would never be apart."

"I'm sorry his life was so humanly finite."

"He said it was fate who decided his life, and no magic had any right to change him." Her remorse was felt in all of them, as if her life pulsated in every one of her cards and guardians. "In the end it is just me."

"No, in the end is Sera," Yue interrupted, "and I."

"My moon guardian," she said, "will you be there in all the ends?"

"Always." He held her hand, pushed the hair on her face behind her shoulder. "I love you."

"I know." Sakura smiled, her perfect lips turning up in a soft rose-color symmetry, a pink that reminded him of early summer. Even if there was no reciprocal statement, her smile – real and full of love – weakened the darkness in his world with its brilliant light. His own lips mirrored the action, softening his look. Sakura had once said he was most handsome in the rare events she witnessed him smile at his brother, because it let her know he could experience a piece of happiness in her reign of magic.

Yue smirked to himself as he cradled the orb. How could he have been foolish to fall for her? He thought himself immune for years, but she changed his mind as she grew into a woman who he found himself admiring. As their magic bond grew, so did an affection he mistook for merely loyalty.

He should have said more, told her his love for her was different. He owed her the words he kept from her for many decades, a debt he never paid.

The orb flickered on its own accord.

"I loved him more each day, even as his hair grayed and the lines on his face deepened. When you're a little girl you fear that period, hope your pretty lustrous hair never fades into gray and your skin to be as perfect as ever. There I was wishing my hands were as frail as his and my bones as delicate."

"He gave you Sera, knowing you would be there for the rest of her life where he couldn't be."

"I want to see him, Yue. Not with Return, Create, or-or... Just him as he was." She produced a card from air, letting him see its identity. "I've found a way, Yue, a path into the other side." Her words filled him with the beginning of fear as it skittered inside of him like hot ants running up the walls of his throat and stomach wall.

"Why, Sakura?" He would not let her leave him.

"What would you give, for a chance to see your love?"

"_I already have her, even if she cannot accept it," _he could have said. Instead he asked: "Isn't it enough to be loved by us?"

_Isn't it enough?_

She let him hold her.

Another flicker, this one from another world. Yue found himself inside his own orb, his snowglobe. In his arms, Sakura blinked her emerald eyes into brown. Her hair darkened a shade and flowed over her shoulders. Her mouth looked sweet, and his hands followed the delicate shape of her face and buried into the soft waves of brown hair, to pull her in closer. Sera could never be afraid of him, as she fought him repeatedly for the control of his domain. He will never let her know that she came into the night because he let her.

She reminded him of life, in the way her lips tested his fictional patience with words and when he parted them with his and let her take over. Life was painful and real, beautiful, feral, and unpredictable. He stopped the kiss, because he must regain authority. Because he knew that she could leave him at any moment, as soon as she learned the new hold she had over his heart.

The orb flickered into fog, and they returned to his home. A branch creaked closer with a winged Sera perched on it. _"Isn't it enough, to be loved by me?"_

"It's-it's—"

"It's what you wanted to ask her, but you're a stubborn coward." She laughed, but he saw the falseness behind this, masking a disappointment he was familiar with, one with bewitched consequences. She faded again, and he was left with the certainty of her return.

Yue folded his arms behind his head. He wondered if The Death brought Sakura the peace her daughter and he searched for in each other. He hoped it was lovely but evanescent, as the blossom Syaoran once introduced to Sera.

Here, Seraphine Li helped fill the empty parts of his canvas with an everlasting splendor with each visit. The ends of his world seemed further each night. There was a shift in the earth as a pond came into existence, with a layer of night bloom water lilies the color of serum-less blood. He expected Sera to despise this new addition, crinkling her nose at their unpleasant smell, as much as hearing him say her entire name with mock. She would inquire about her Brahma Kamal garden, and he would kiss her again to make her forget everything.

The moon was full and pale blue, as Yue waited for a star to find its way back into the sky, within the snowglobe a young mistress once weld for him, to live out his heaven.


	2. The Future Holds

I knew it was only a matter of time until I lost her to him. Kero inquired if I held any regrets, and I replied with a solid 'No.' I didn't put up a fight, because it was always him.

My heart was too guarded to let her in as easily as she welcomed me into hers. She deserved more, she deserved to be loved without doubts a life as long as mine had placed indefinitely.

Syaoran loved her truly, and who else would be a better match than someone who'd understood her power, who would defend her with the same dedication as her guardians, and who was simply human? _Human._ Centuries of living hardened me, driven the last speck of recognizable humanity away.

She had reclaimed what she could back in the years we've lived together, but my fragile humanity always hung on a thin thread that would snap at any moment.

All I had were memories of us.

The first kiss we shared.

The first night we shared the same bed.

The day she said she loved me.

The many days after in which I replied that I did, too.

. O .

The boy was at most ten years of age, with a disheveled head of light brown hair and icy blue eyes that were unmistakably cat-like, as their pupils remained thin slits to keep out the superfluous daylight. He had been watching me and spoke first. "You're almost exactly how mom said you'd be like. I thought you'd be a smidge taller."

"Who are you?" I asked.

The boy chuckled. "I apologize, I should have introduced myself first… or _should I?_ All you need to know is that I'm a visitor from the future. I'm here to make sure things don't change."

"Why would they change?"

"I have an answer. Mom wrote it down for me." He searched in his pockets, finally producing a folded piece of paper with cursive writing in dark blue ink_. "Time heals all wounds."_

"That's hardly riveting or convincing."

"You will have your happy ending, and yes, I am proof of that." He smiled a lion-like grin. "Go ahead and ask me."

"Are you… are you our son?"

"We're related, yes."

I could only think of one possibility. "Sakura, you and I?"

"It's not that simple."

"What's the point of asking if the answers are vague?"

The boy shrugged his shoulders. "Have you seen my _uncle_?"

Another possibility I didn't voice, for he wasn't going to give me a 'yes' or 'no' answer. The future was more complicated than it should be.

.O.

"If I didn't have your blessing, I wouldn't be here," Sakura said.

"I can't stop your happiness for my own selfishness."

The skirts of the wedding dress moved when she twirled to meet my gaze. "I was happy with _you_."

"How could you be happy with only half?"

"Because it was mine, completely."

I gave her the sapphire of my armor, remodeled and crafted into a brooch with a winged setting. I placed it on the silver belt on the dress. _Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue…_

I ignored the saddened expression on her face, unable to look at her directly. "Syaoran's waiting."

"If I wasn't pregnant with his daughter, would we still be doing this?"

"It doesn't matter to me anymore."

It was a lie. It was everything.

.O.

Yukito looked up at the mirrored ceiling of the church, where his gaze met me from the other world. He silently mouthed, _"Are you okay?"_

"Not yet."

"_Do you want to leave?"_

I shook my head. The only way I could let her go was to watch her recite her vows to the man I could have been in a different life.

In this one, my heart belonged to the future, where somebody waited for me.


	3. Musings

**Disclaimer: **I don't own CCS.

**Author's Note:**I wrote this in spite of my Writer's Block. I love the character Yue and decided to write about his relationship with Sakura. In this fic, Sakura and Li are older, so they can be a couple (Y/S or S/S). For those who don't understand it, it is a fic told through two different points of views, Yue and Sakura's. These *** mean a change of POV. One shot.

* * *

**Musings**

* * *

_It's raining again. The moon is alit and the clouds are high. The pitter-patter of the drops against the glass panes of the greenhouse is mellifluous to the ear. It's like the rain had a song to sing, but can only provide the awing beat. It's waiting for someone to listen before its song begins. And that is why I'm here. Yes, I'm going to __listen_ to the rain.

Maybe I shouldn't. Silence is golden, and I'd hate to see it broken. I'm not alone either, but I don't let that faze me.

Behind a bush, under the stars, atop the trees, and beneath the shimmering ponds, they are watching me. Forest creatures surround me, yet I'm not alarmed by their peculiar presence. It is night, and knowing that my silver crescent glitters attractively above, makes me feel like I'm home.

_I'm home._

*...*...*

I just love the rain, the feel of the cold, supple beads as they slide distressingly away from my face. They cling to my warmth, but in the end, they fall to the ground, only to mix with the saturated earth and give birth to a new season, spring.

I brushed back my hair, tossing the wet strands behind a red plastic clip.

The clip, such a lovely gift, considering how tousled my hair usually is. I remembered thanking Syaoran at least a dozen times for the surprise. I can imagine my poor Syaoran; flushed red in embarrassment, nervously eyeing the clips, while girls around him gave him weird looks. _Just what was this boy doing at a place like this?_ I can't help giggling, but when he appears, my giggles succumb to his weak smile and I _blush from head to toe._

I recalled the many times I held his body close to my heart, feeling his humid breath against the nape of my neck. How wonderful it felt to be needed, like I was the damsel saving Prince Charming from the fire-breathing dragon. Yes, I hated to see him get hurt, but at the same time, I wished him in my arms, comforting him.

_I feel so alone without you, like I'm stranded on an island, so far away from home. But when you're in my arms, I'm home._

I'm home.

*...*...*

I couldn't believe I had called a park my home. Home? I have not home. I have a duty as a guardian, no home.

My mind diverted from the subject to the sky. I had forgotten how long I had been out. My other self, Yukito, had to get some rest. He had his own life, and part of it was studying, another living in perplexity.

I left this small piece of nature for the unpredictable, rampant world surrounding it. Shaking off a few sodden leaves from my wings, I prepared to depart. Maybe I shouldn't be flying with this weather, but like I said before, I love the rain. Besides, Yukito needed a break, just how would he ever sleep again after waking up in a park?

I took off, flying as close to the moon as I could. The weight of my wings increased as they soaked up the rain. I ignored its effect and continued to glide over the city, past buildings, past trees, past static traffic, and past a lonesome pedestrian.

A familiar laughter escaped from her lips, a fermenting disharmony against the mute background. It was Sakura, laughing, spirited, clothes completely drenched. I hate to say it but she looked breathtaking.

*...*...*

But he was not coming back, was he? He had been gone for too long. I bet he wouldn't even remember me.

It's getting late, or should I say early? It'll be morning soon, another day to live without him.

Without an umbrella or cloak, I made my way out of the park onto the avenue, artificially lit by light poles from here to home. Regardless of being tired from staying out all night, I felt ecstatic with the rain pouring down on me. If Kero were around, he would have scolded me endlessly for being so careless. I couldn't help it. I love it when it rains.

My belly somersaulted in shameless laughter. I was laughing despite the vacant feeling in my heart. I couldn't believe I was laughing.

*...*...*

Of course she was laughing, a girl who had so much going for her had no reason to be miserable. I, in contrast, had. I was only a guardian. She was the cardcaptor, the rightful owner of the Clow cards. I would have gone on and on about how rich her life was if I hadn't heard a smothered cry.

She was crying.

Pride wounded, I rejected her friendship once. I thought it was about time for me to ask for forgiveness.

*...*...*

I remembered why I was laughing. Syaoran and I used to sneak out at night and walk down avenues, hands clasped, and occasionally kiss.

_Now I'm crying._

* * *

The girl was unaware of pale blue eyes watching her attentively from above. She simply brushed away the tepid tears and sped up, dodging fire hydrants and wastebaskets on the way. The waving silhouettes of trees parted with the last of the storm clouds. It wasn't until the winged shadow on the pavement darkened in the unfolding dawn, that she became aware of his presence. Stopping in her tracks, she watched the slender, magnificent white creature land in front of her.

Sakura let out a tiny gasp, recoiling in surprise. _Had he been following her all night?_

But before she could ask anything, Yue spoke first. "Mistress, do you remember Judgment Day, how you offered yourself as a friend?"

"Yes. Why?"

His face lightened, making him look more like an angel rather than the sour guardian that scorned her amateurishness. "Does the offer still stand?"

"Of course." She smiled wanly. Sakura flung herself upon him, placing both arms around his waist. She did not understand why she had reacted with cowardice instead of courage. Why her numb knees felt like they would shatter against the concrete if she would have kept on walking. Why his cold embrace warmed her instantly. Why life was such a paradox.

He wasn't Li, he wasn't the one she loved. But he was someone to her at the moment, and she refused to let go.

The stranger watched them from a distance, still deciding whether or not to give away his presence.

*...*...*

There she was, his Sakura, but she wasn't his anymore.

The unforgettable picture of Yue and Sakura holding each other made it clear that there was no room for him in her life. And when she planted a small kiss on his cheek, his heart twanged in disbelief; the smile on her face tore it out.

He was too late. _Good-bye, Sakura. _

Syaoran's amber-brown eyes flashed resentfully and sadly at the two of them. He turned around and started down the avenue.

He should have known better. This was not his home. It never was.

_I wish I were home._

*...*...*

Dawn was here, but who would have known? The world had slept through the night, twilight, and all, but one thing was certain; today was going to be a beautiful day.


	4. The Moon and I

**Disclaimer:**I don't own CCS or this snippet: "sable-vested Night," so CLAMP and Longfellow, please don't sue me :o(

**Author's Note:** Long live Yue/Sakura fandom! J/K –I just felt like writing a poem, it has been so long _*remembers her ReBoot poem*_. Ack! I must stop writing in this section, I need my daily dose of ReBoot- right after I read more Yue/Sakura fics _*smirk*_ Keep both of 'em coming, people!

* * *

The Moon and I

*  
_Above the stars, the moon, the sky.  
Will we all, in celestial heaven, reunite.  
So much for love and good-byes...  
_

**We're watching the world pass us by,  
The Moon and I**  
*

* * *

...And we remember the many forgotten stories...

* * *

There's the girl who used to hear wedding bells,  
-Dream of wedding, of a dress of white chiffon-  
Her flaring-red eyes at those memories well,  
fighting back tears as she remembers someone.  
She left for home and we all bid her farewell.  
Never forgotten, we wonder why she still longs  
For the one that stole my mistress' heart  
Who claims it now, taking others' apart...

"What are you waiting for, Meiling?"  
"Waiting for what time shall bring."  
"You think he's coming back, don't you?"  
"I know he will. Don't you think so, too?"

The night is struck with deadpan silence  
Then her words become livid and grow violent,  
We sit and watch her cry,  
The Moon and I

It's dark. It's night, but not a star is aglow  
Unbelievable it seems, to have a star within a crowd.  
Her amethyst-eyes dance as they consume the shadows.  
No one notices, no one stops, no one cheers aloud  
For the girl with the camera, the cause of our heartfelt vertigo.  
An angel, perhaps, that has fallen off her heavenly cloud.  
Avoiding the stage, she follows her own star around.  
How we wish true stars like her were abound...

"Why not tell us who you really are, Tomoyo?"  
"I'm Tomoyo and that's all you need to know."  
"Why hide your true face behind this façade?"  
"To escape from my life's perfect ballade."

She walks away, losing herself in the masses  
Who could tell this child tops the social classes?  
Her grandeur, we hear her deny,  
The Moon and I

Here's the one that carries remnants of Clow in his blood.  
He confessed his love, and I confessed my hate.  
Magic and pride, in this young one, seeming to flood  
Like the rivers in a storm, but none used to captivate  
My mistress' adoration, sending sparks flying amuck.  
The gold and red array of morning, for day, I await  
When I see them embracing in the sable-vested Night,  
My heart falters and stutters as I witness the blight...

"What makes you think your heart is right, Syaoran?"  
"For once, I trusted my instinct and went against my clan."  
"How am I to believe that you won't leave her like the other?"  
"My heart has chosen, and thus, there will never be another."

In the far off distant, we hear a familiar laughter.  
The boy runs off like a prey being sought after.  
He's smiling and we know why,  
The Moon and I

My mistress flies under the glowing, full moon,  
Over the city, guarding the lives of those within it.  
A sorceress to be, she brings light to the gloom.  
She claims to be a friend but I know she hides a secret.  
It changes not her heart or mine, and soon enough, I shall attune  
(For I know that my future is encrypted in fine granite)  
- to time, to change, to a new master, to a new world-  
I will be able to lock into her emerald gaze and see not a girl...

"I shall see my new mistress Sakura."

"I shall join him in the lunar aurora."

"Accept fate and my destiny, for her."

"Watch the city below become a blur."

""If only you knew how much I love you.""

""If only dreams and fairytales came true...""

_We spot her above, riding faithful Fly,  
The Moon and I_

""To the past I whisper an 'adieu'""

""I'm hoping my future lies with you""

_I spot our Yue below while riding the Fly,  
The Moon and I_

**We watch the world pass us by,  
The Moon and I**


	5. The Waltz

The stanza in the ending is from "MY PAPA'S WALTZ," by Theodore Roethke. Please Read and Review.

*^_^*

* * *

I n n o c e n c e 's_______W a l t z

* * *

_*           Dinner Demise           *_

Drunk and flustered, she totters on the floor, blinded by the glare of chandelier lights reflecting off the gleaming marble, silver glass-walls, and polished gold accenting the extravagant décor. She rubs her eyes, red and puffy, with the back of her hand. It is bruised and bleeding, Yue notices.

He leans down to the feasting lion seated next to him and asks, "What happened to our mistress's hand?" In between snacking on fine cheeses and spicy meats, the lion mumbles something incoherent.

"What?"

"She got bloody drunk sometime around midnight," says Spinel from across the table. "As she was running to the front door, she bumped into one of Daidouji's statues, entangling her shawl and gown on its outstretched arms. She thought it was some drunken bloke trying to cope a feel and punched him. She pulverized it with her fist, and with her free hand, freed her gown from its clutch. Then she ran off maniacally." He sniggers and clears his voice. "I videotaped it. Care to watch?"

Before the moon guardian could dispute, leap down his throat, or concoct moon crystals, Keroberos launches a dish of deviled eggs at Spinel. 

_Well, that works too_, Yue thinks.

"Shut your hole," reprimands Keroberos. "Or I'll do something very unpleasant with the birthday cake and that video camera your carrying…One can only imagine the pleasure attainable with the two items…right, Yue?"

"Shut this, you gluttonous fur ball!" The egged guardian barrages his nemesis with a basket-full of hard dinner rolls. They bounce off the lion's head and crack on the pavement. One smacks against the glass door of the mansion, leaving a spiderweb-like fracture, shimmering silver in the moonlight. Another one strikes Yue, who considerably annoyed by his brother and Spinel's game, slips away, unnoticed, to the glass door. 

Spinel and Keroberos holler obscenities behind him, and Ruby Moon's tittering, despite her absence at the guardians' table, still cements itself to his mind.  The mortals rejoice in the euphoric party inside, some drunk on alcohol and others on the music, while the guardians are set aside, ordered to remove their wings and any other oddity, and to be good. 

He traces the fracture on the glass, wondering if someone else will notice it before the night is over. _Hell, we already broke one rule._

The guardian folds his wings, makes them vanish, and enters without uncertainty.

_*           Moonchildren at Play           *_

Inside, Yue's gaze follows Sakura. She walks towards another girl, who is busy being courted by every bachelor of every age in the room on her night, none of which spark any interest in her. 

_Tomoyo_, he deduces from the violet gown she wears and the smoky dark hair piled high on her head. It gives off a lavender hue in the light. Her cream skin glows, as if embers smoldered beneath her flesh.

His mistress mouths something. Perhaps she is saying something in actuality, but with the music playing, it's hard to tell. 

The girl in the violet gown immediately abandons her suitors for Sakura, and wraps an arm around her shoulders.

He is certain of her identity. It is she, Sakura, who eludes him since his arrival an hour ago. She stands there, half lit and overexposed in her flimsy, torn, pink gown, unladylike… Unlike Sakura. Still, his eyes roam over her shamelessly.

"_You want her_…" a voice whispers into his ear. He remains unalarmed as pale arms circle his waist. "Poor Yue… you're so pathetically in love…" He turns his head to the side, and sees Ruby Moon smirking at him. Her hands, daring him to lose his temper, slide down his white satin coat to his crotch. Yue halts her hands there, as to make those witnessing the scene believe they are lovers rather than a quarreling couple. 

"I've missed you," Ruby says, resting her head on his shoulders. Her magenta-red hair cascades down his chest like a fountain of liquid ruby. He brushes it away, finding it hard to interpret her words, her tone, _her_.  "I've missed harassing you as much as I've missed playing with my Touya-kun."

"Then go play with him!" he whispers sharply to her. 

She smiles up at him, tracing his chin with her thumb. "He left after talking to someone on the phone." She flicks his lower lip. 

Yue takes her by the arm and harshly instructs her to take a walk with him. 

"Why? Is she watching? Is that why you want to leave?" She looks at Sakura who is seated at a table looking back at her with an impassive face. "Ah." 

"_Let's go_," Yue orders her stiffly. The strength and roughness of his words lose their effect on her when she sights the pink in his cheeks.

Ruby laughs. "You're so pathetic," she says, before kissing him on the cold lips and pulling him away. 

_*            The Way Things Are             *_

The lights and sounds are smeared messily across the room, as if a fledgling artist had his way with the walls and even the countenances of the crookedly smiling dancers. Sakura looks down at her right exposed leg, mesmerized by the zigzagging cut on her thigh. "Tomoyo-chan, look… my gash wants to fly away…"

Tomoyo, having been watching her for some time, frowns and brushes her friend's hair away from her red-rimmed eyes. "See. It's still there, and very much static. You're just drunk, that's all." 

"Oh." Sakura heaves a sigh and slumps down in her chair. 

Tapping her index finger against the side of her mouth, Tomoyo suddenly smiles. "Would you like me to take you to Yue and Kero? They're in need of company, and the tranquility will help you clear your head."

"I saw Yue, or I think I did… with Ruby. And Kero and Suppi are probably at the table making a mess…" She remains silent momentarily, then dissolves into tears. "I'm sorry… I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make a scene on your birthday…"  

Tomoyo hugs her friend, who continues to whisper her _sorry_s into her neck. She lifts Sakura's chin, twines her fingers with her tearstained ones, and smiles.

"People do foolish things when they're in love, nay?" 

And she kisses her, amidst the guests, music, and dance…

_*           Moonchildren At Play          *_

            Outside in the dark garden, Yue and Ruby Moon sit on a wooden bench, each on opposite ends. Yue fumbles the wooden armrest on his end, desperately thinking up the right question.

 "How long have you been here?" he asks.

Ruby Moon seems unfocused in the conversation. Her mind wanders like the shadows that wrought their forms on the garden beds and pastel-colored stepping-stones. Even so, she heeds his question with a veil of disdain. "That's the thing I don't like about you. You're always secretly scheming, using equations to ask questions, to indirectly get what you want. I bet you were gonna ask next if there was any 'dissension or altercation amongst the guests tonight,' in that pompous, apathetic tone of yours. Why don't you just say it? Ask me why Sakura was drunk?"

Hiding his shock behind his stolid face, the guardian responds dully, "Fine. Why was Sakura drunk?" 

"Syaoran. Li Syaoran."

"What?" His voice is rasp with anger. If his facial expression changed as it usually did at the mention of the boy's name in a conversation about Sakura, Ruby did not point it out. She looks past him, at two lanky shadows, watching their elongated limbs grow nearer. 

Ruby's wings materialize and spread out. She takes the stunned Yue from the wrist, pulling him up a tree with her. The white-haired guardian rubs his wrist, as if to scour away the feeling of her skin against him. He rests his head against the trunk, nestling his feet on a flowery branch. Had his feet been barefoot like they usually were and not enclosed in tight white suede shoes, he'd feel the relieving coolness of the fruit blossoms. Slightly aggravated by this, he asks, "Why a tree?" 

"_Shh! They're coming this way!_" Ruby sits herself across from him, a branch higher.

"Who?"

"The couple." 

"I don't give a damn—" He is cut off by another _"Shh!" _from Ruby.

*           _The Way Things Are           _*

            "How many time's have I nicely, _politely_ told you you're only my friend?" Sakura demands, but the faltering authority in her dulcet voice is lost in her disconsolate face. She walks aside Tomoyo in the garden, whose barrenness and obscurity offered confidentiality. "I don't like doing this, Tomoyo. Every time you touch me that way, or kiss me like that… I'm scared. I'm scared of losing you… and Syaoran…"

            They reach the bench, without the intention of sitting down. Tomoyo walks a bit ahead, and then turns to Sakura as if affronted by the name, with doll-like glass eyes glinting sadly. "Syaoran. It's always Syaoran…" _…before me._ Her voice is still calm, undaunted by hurt or rejection. "Tell me sincerely why you came here." Silence. "It was because it offered you an excuse to see him, wasn't it?"

            "Tomoyo-chan…" Sakura begins. Denying it would be futile. She'd already hurt herself tonight, running towards the guest whom she had mistaken for her Syaoran. 

            Tomoyo looks down at her friend's bruised hand. "He'll be here. Your brother went to pick him up." 

             The auburn-haired girl says nothing, huffing once the misty air. Inward, she smiles guiltily. _He's coming… for me._

With noiseless steps, Tomoyo makes her journey back to the ballroom. It is not the first time she walks alone through this garden, or anywhere else.

*           _Dinner Demise           _*

            A dinner table lies in shameful death on the egg-and-bread-covered pavement. Its exquisite carvings are bathed in sour cream and nacho cheese. In the darkening courtyard, a grimy cherub smiles upside-down from the table's leg, at the brawling sun guardians. 

            "What the fuck are we going to tell Tomoyo?!" yells Keroberos. Flipping over a dish of corn chips, he then proceeds to eating the ones on top. "Vhis is ahll your fult."

            "Shaddup! Someone's coming!" Both guardians transform into their plush selves and leap into the bushes.

            Three people enter the guardians' area: two men and a drunken woman. 

            "Let me go!" The woman screams at the male brunette, whose rage is directed at the blue-haired gentleman grinning at him. 

            The gentleman fixes the glasses on his face, and then focuses his sapphire-blue eyes on the two. "I believe things could be settled more civilly than this."

            "Oh, really?" the brunette jeers. "Civility wasn't taken in account when you were snogging my girl!"

            Behind the bushes, Keroberos and Spinel watch with wide-eyed interest.

            Spinel turns to his nemesis. "Leave it to males to fight over the stupidest things: females."

            "_Shh! _I wanna see them fight!"

            "Snogging?" The gentleman laughs lightly. "She affixed her arms and legs onto myself and began suffocating me—reeking of alcohol. Her heart wasn't in the…_kiss_, nor was her mind present."

            Infuriated, the brunette wrestles down the gentleman. "How dare you! How dare you insult my girl!?" 

The woman screams. The gentleman sends her lover flying across with a swift movement of his hand. The brunette skitters on food remains, coming at a halt when he hits the fence. 

"Eriol?" Spinel narrows his eyes, focusing on the gentleman. 

Smiling, the gentleman turns to their bush, nods, and leaves. 

"Oh! Victor!" the woman cries out, running towards the brunette. "Are you all right?" 

He flings from her touch. "Were you really that drunk?" 

Canard-red eyes beam down at him. "I still am," she says, pushing back her coal-dark hair. 

"Then, yes"—he smiles painfully—"I'm all right." They kiss. Their moans are audible within the courtyard; the revolted guardians box their ears with their paws. 

"My virgin ears!" exclaims Keroberos. 

Spinel makes another remarkable discovery. "Say… isn't that Meili—" 

"Don't say it!"

*           _Moonchildren at Play           _*

"Hmm… that went well," comments Ruby. She is retorted with a scowl from Yue, and she pouts. "It's so sad! Isn't it? Tomoyo-chan and you love Sakura-chan, when she only has eyes for the Li kid. And, and no one bothers to ask whom I love! The nerve!" She grabs her hair in fists, playing angry. "Wah! No one cares!" 

"Quit complaining," Yue commands.

Perched on the branch, Ruby listens to distant voices. Recognizing one, she smiles kindly.

"What is it?" 

Butterfly wings reappear and the guardian deserts her companion. In mid-flight she announces cheerfully: "It's my Touya-kun!"

Lone, the white-haired guardian picks some leaves from the tree. A few loose blossom petals sprinkle down like snow. Things tonight have been unruly, and the arrival of the brother and Her lover would do little to change that. Yue closes his eyes, yearning to fall asleep. But he is a creature of the moon, of the dark, of the night. Sleep will come with the morning… 

He allows his wings to carry him down and release him from a cat's captivity in a tree. A waxing moon is held in each of his feline silver/azure eyes. 

Tonight he will prowl.

-----------------------------------------

*           _Boys Are Nothing but Trouble_          *

"Are you cold?" Syaoran shakes his head, rubbing his palms against his sable-black tuxedo. Touya hands him the two bouquets: a bouquet of purple roses for the birthday girl, Tomoyo, and a special bouquet composed of eighteen silver roses and one red rose, one for each birth-year, for Sakura. He squints his eyes; the wind speeds have elevated since his arrival, and he now faces the task of keeping the bouquets of roses intact. 

"Thank you," Syaoran murmurs. Touya nods. Conversation, until now, has been sparse and serious.  Touya offers him his jacket. "I said I was fine."

A murderous gaze is directed at him. He takes the jacket.

Touya eyes him, enmity accruing within him. "I want you to make promise right now."

"Another one?"

"This is about Sakura."

"It always is…" he pauses, taking in the glowers from Touya. "All right."

"1) To me, the monster is a paragon of innocence. I want you to protect that image, because deep inside I know you see her as an angel, too."

Syaoran nods.

"2) Don't give her false hope. If your love is not as strong as hers for—"

Syaoran's furrows his brows. "I love her with—"

"Don't interrupt me." He continues: "If your love is not as strong as hers for you, then end it now. The worse place to be is in a relationship where only one of you is keeping it together. It's better to be with someone whom loves you the same amount as you love them."

"Why are you telling me this? Don't you think I love her?"

"I know that she loves you," Touya says. "3) –"

"Three? Are you going to make me sign a document at the end?" 

"Gaki… you're starting to piss me off. Now shut your trap and listen. 3)—"

"Touya-kun!" Ruby shouts and whooshes over them, followed by a raining of rose petals. 

"Watch it!" Syaoran warns. He collects as many silver petals he can, letting the purple ones fall to the floor.

"I thought Tomoyo said no flying or magic tonight,"  Touya states questioningly.

Ruby nods with a wicked smile on her lips. She tucks a lock of magenta hair behind an ear and approaches him with a seductive catwalk.

"I know that look…" Touya begins backing away. "Don't! Or I'll scream!"

"You sissy!" Pinning him down, she turns to Syaoran. "Go. Sakura is waiting for you."

Touya struggles in vain. Ruby is not his average fangirl... "Tell Yuki I'm here, if you see him or Yue," and whispering, he adds: "Tell him I'm in dire need of help…"

*           _A Minor Glitch           _*

            _I think about all the times I've waited for you to come to me, and how disappointed I become, and how disheveled and terrible I look when you finally come for me. My hand is bruised. My leg is bleeding. My gown is torn. My friend is upset. Sediments of a statue are strewn throughout the hall, a victim of my blindness. I didn't use to be like this. I used to be fairly composed as a child, before you. _Boys are nothing but trouble_. I forget who told me this… Sonomi perhaps. _

_            Yeah, boys are nothing but trouble, but in the end, they're worth it._

Sakura sees Tomoyo accompanied by Kaho. A child tugs at Kaho's waist. His hair sticks up in turquoise spikes, and he is attempting to get her attention by waving the plush animal he holds in the other hand. The toy is very much alive, for it pushes its cotton and plastic legs angrily against the surrounding air, aiming at its wretched holder.  "Mommy," the boy blares out, "Daddy's in trouble again!"

            _I wish I could make her happy. Sometimes I wish I did love her that way… or that she never loved me… that she hated me. God, how I wish you hated me, Tomoyo. Then it wouldn't hurt me as much… _

_            I could wish for me to never be born, for you to love someone else, but things will never change. I've yet to wield the power to change _the way things are.

She stumbles in the dark hallway on concrete debris: the statue. At a snail's pace, still paining from walking in heels, she makes her way around it. As she passes by the courtyard's glass doors, she hears voices. Sakura peeks into the door and gasps at what she sees. Not only has a couple found their way to the guardian's area and are tangled on the floor, but also the fancy dinner and table have been destroyed. 

            Kero and Spinel quietly argue over the ownership of a steak.

            _A _dinner demise._ Oh, Kero, how could you? I give you simple commands and you and your sun comrade go berserk. _

            _Where's…No._

_            Not you. Not you. _Not you, Yue._ Nakuru yes, but _not you.

_It seems to me that the _moonchildren_ are _at play_. Nothing ever goes according to my plans… _

She slinks down, back against the wall; her dress rises to her waist. She thinks of her lover's face, enraptured by the memory's clarity. 

Footfalls approach.

She holds the Return card between her forefinger and middle finger. Tonight could end differently, if she only went back a few hours and made all the wrongs right… Go back before knowing that her lover would come, before seeing the guest with her lover's eyes, before the statue, and before the kiss…

The gold edges of the card capture the moonlight in a flash.

It draws her to its magic, tempting her to assuage her pain with its power. 

"Don't be a coward."

She stares at the intruder's pale face. _Yue…_

He keeps his distance. "You don't need a card to make things right. The use of magic will only identify your weakness, as well as worsen your problems."

This time she snaps back, "I can do without it just _fine_."

"Then why does it signal you? You hold it now because you believe you need it."

"I need—"

"To forget."  Yue's cat eyes turn into threatened slits. "Mistress, _He_ is here." She is about to ask who, when she remembers: the only names he avoids are Clow's and… _Syaoran's._

Sakura holds the card to her chest ad makes it disappear. "I need to forget.

"I need to see Syaoran."

Yue turns away, walking towards the exit.

"Where are you going?" Sakura asks.

His hand is on the doorknob, fingers drumming its gold contour. "For a midnight flight."

"When will I see you again?" Yue opens the door.

"When you need me." It is a statement spoken with a minute fragment of emotion.

She hugs him, inhaling his sensual scent of spring and night breeze and musk. "I needed you tonight, as I need you now. Why didn't you come to me sooner?"

"Because it's not me you want to hold…" He wants to put his arms possessively around her, slip his hands beneath the diaphanous fabric of her clinging dress, but resists unnervingly, his arms stiff by his sides.

"Hm?" she raises a brow. "Sometimes you confuse me. Whenever I think you're about to kiss me, you give me a shove."

"It's my duty as a guardian to watch over you. I never meant to insinuate that…"

"Yes, I know." She kisses him lightly on the neck, her cheek brushing against his. She lets him go. "Promise me something."

"Yes?"

"Promise me that"—she lifts a finger—"you'll take care of her." A second finger is raised. "Your love for her is as strong as her love for you—" a third finger rises—"and that you…"

He takes her raised hand, enclosing its toffee-rose fingers, warm and delicate, in his frigid ashen ones. He lifts it to his lips. "I don't love Ruby Moon, Mistress," he confesses and kisses her hand, "and never will." Her expression is either downcast or of relief; he doesn't let her ambivalence impinge on his confession. "To her I am her playmate, like your brother and Yukito. And she only has eyes for the sadistic ogre beckoning to her with its demon eyes from the mirror. She loves no one… and that is precisely who she is to me: no one."

Sakura timidly chuckles, hand on a reddening cheek. "I don't know what to say now."

"But you know what to do, where to go, who to look for."

"Syaoran?" _Is that who you are referring to?_ she thinks, anger beginning to surge.  "He is only a part of me. I am myself, undefined by anything or anyone." 

Yue crosses his arms and presses his head and left feet against the wall, his thigh jutting forward. "I don't believe you. All this night, you've waited for him, humiliated yourself for him, and now you deny your love for him." He simpers. "Poor dupe, to be betrothed to you…"

"Betrothed?" 

"What? You're not to wed him?"

"No," she lies. There will be no more humiliation, especially not from _him_.

A slight riffle of foil causes the guardian to lose his composure. "Li Syaoran," he declares looking past her and wings away into the night sky. 

"What?"  She turns to where his gaze is adhered. 

_He_ stands there, shadows and light flailing at his ghost-expression, like flares of day and night reaching out to him. His arms are unmoving, hands clutching ruffled roses, which hang their heads limply. Their beauty and vigor died along with the spirit of this moment. 

"Syaoran!" Elated, Sakura runs to him, wounds her arms around him. 

"Don't touch me," he utters. There is pain in his eyes, she sees. As if something died within him… and refuses to accept that it is gone. He carries that feeling's corpse in his overcastting eyes.

"What's wrong?" She can feel, see his heart disband in his eyes into tears.

There is no longer love ensnared behind them.

It is then that she produces a card from air.

Syaoran's eyes widen, the whites drowning the preciousness of ambers. In alarm, he strains to seize the card when she calls out its name:

"Time!"

------------------------------------

_*           *           *_

_            "Touya-kun?" Ruby Moon presses her ear against his chest. He is not breathing or moving. _

_            Neither are the trees swaying nor the wind flinging dust and strangely tinted petals at her._

_*           *           *_

_            "Do you feel it?" Keroberos asks._

_            "_Yes…_" Spinel's sea-hued eyes are riveted onto the couple frozen mid-sexual ecstasy._

_            The strident grumbles of a stomach divert Spinel's attention. Keroberos squeezes his grumbling belly. "Do you want to raid the buffet table?"_

_             "_Yes…_" the cat replies sincerely and smiles._

_*           *           *_

_            Yue flies over Tomoeda. The city is peaceful tonight; then again, from this height, everything below seems peaceful. Were he to land, he'd hear street musicians playing their sole property to prudent civilians, the squabbles of neighbors, and the yelps of dogs. They all seem stagnant and mute from his point of view. _

_He is thankful for this silence._

_His consciousness urges him to return, but his stubbornness carries him on, letting him fly on wings, that though give him the resemblance of angels, he is nowhere near their pleasantness or similarity in heart._

_Now he tells himself that he is bored of this flight…_

_He's thinking of what he wants to do, or what he should do in general._

_Stopping, he realizes he should have told his brother to save some dinner rolls for Yukito. _

*           *           *

            The ballroom is quiet. Its occupants remind her of porcelain figures that pirouette and move their fragile limbs in accord to childhood sonatas. They, however, aren't moving. 

            Sakura seats herself on the center of ballroom, tossing her shoes off afterward. The Time and Return drift around her, subsequently descending like feathers, carefully to the waxed floor. The sun guardians watch with quasi-curiosity, as one gouges down French pastries, the other sausage-and-cracker appetizers. Remains of crackers, crusts and jam drizzle down their chests and rounding bellies. Sakura spots Spinel attempting to hide from her behind a lemon-coconut cake. Approaching with caution, she quizzically analyzes the very much moving guardian. She plucks him from the table and watches him squirm in her closed hand. "You're supposed to be frozen… How--" 

A red and black figure zooms past her. Taken aback, Sakura drops Spinel. Ruby Moon lands next to the cards. "Spinel and I are bounded to you are we are to Eriol-san," she explains, "Because of the transformation of the last two cards, we are now also your guardians. We carry on our own responsibilities toward you. It was our old master's want."

Sakura is silent, taking in all of tonight's happenings up until now.  

"What are you waiting for?" Ruby asks.

            "I don't know." Her jaw quivers for a moment; she sniffs, and sees the moon guardian studying her with feigned understanding. Had it been her false form, Nakuru, she'd feel more comfortable with her being there. Before the moon guardian, she experiences a flash of the past, when she faced the reincarnation of Clow. The tense in the air, now, as it was at then, is soaring. She glances quickly around the room, as if a confrontation is to be anticipated.

            Ruby gathers the Return. With the card in hand, she is ready to propose a solution to her second master. "This night hasn't been good to you. It has only brought pain, hasn't it?" Sakura's lips part, and her glazed over eyes enlarge. Ruby presents her the card. "It is not up to anyone to change the past and that is because it can't be done by just anyone. Those who can should if that change is for the better," says the true Nakuru. 

            A steaming strudel is shoved far into Kero's mouth, hot raspberry marmalade searing his pharynx at the exact instant he is about to disrupt Ruby.  Spinel wipes the gluey sugar from his paws onto the mantle. 

             "She is strong enough by herself to see tomorrow as it comes," someone says. All four turn to its source: the top of the stairs twisting upward to the second floor. The moon guardian skillfully balances himself on the thin, slick railing. Wings lacking, he leans to the audience of unwitting dancers, guardians, and a sorceress, his distressing mistress. Halfway in falling, a faint sketch of wings protrudes from his back, and prior to landing, becomes two feathery, tangible wings. Yue lifts the abandoned Time and hands it to Sakura. 

            Sakura takes neither the Return nor Time.

She is unable to decide between the cards the moon guardians hold. Pitifully, she looks to her guardian Yue for help. "Which one should I choose?" 

"I'm only your guardian," he tells her, "not your advisor. I can only offer you the other side of the story. It is up to you to make the decision unaided."

_You're supposed to help me… All four of you_! Her gaze travels from the gorging gold sun guardian, to the butterfly-winged cat with the disturbing grin, to the androgynous beauty of the moon guardians. __

"_What are you waiting for?_" Ruby asks her fervently, whilst Yue's silence does naught less than confound.

_I can't do this. I can't do this _alone_! _

_I can't! I can't. I can't… _can I_?_

-----------------****

**A/N: Someone said it was confusing, so I better clear up a couple of things. These are three different endings for three different days. Sakura is reliving the same night again and again. –sighs—Time manipulation is tough to explain/understand o.O. I hope this helps.**

**---------------------**

_I'm strong enough… _

Sakura takes Time. 

"TIME!"

"No!" Spinel and Kero chorus.  Spinel drops to the floor as soon as the dancing continues. 

"Hide, you fool!" he calls to Kero from beneath the table. Kero grabs as many snacks as he can and joins Spinel.

The Return in Ruby's hand dissolves away. She trembles, feeling betrayed and unworthy to the moon guardian standing next to her. "You will regret this…" she says tearfully, to Sakura. Ruby exits. Her wings become the central attention of the women, who gossip amongst themselves on who designed her superb dress. The single men nudge roughly each other on the sides as she passes by. None dare to introduce themselves to her.

Among those who are watching, is Tomoyo. She watches Sakura and Yue with an indecipherable look about her visage. 

"Let's go," Sakura says to Yue.

He remains amazingly attentive and responsive to her, withstanding the giggles of women and their swooning from all sides. "Where to, Mistress?"

Sakura cups his hand with hers and kisses it. In a show of sleight, she makes the Fly appear from the kiss. She releases his hand, and raises the Fly. "To the night sky."

They fly hand-in-hand with unsettling peace...

She would later remember conversing with him, but the chaos within her dreams and experiences allows no wholly remembrance of the dialogue, only of anonymous snippets. This is all she remembers:

They fly hand-in-hand with unsettling peace, pleased to be free from the night's musical pseudo-romanticism. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sakura closes her eyes, lifting a new card to the air. She turns it over, so that its name faces the guardians. 

            "Sleep!"

            Ruby flounders against her will, mouthing a silent no. She falls into involuntary slumber.  Yue catches her, knocks a vase from a table so that it shatters loudly on the floor, and places her there; her sleeping face is framed with fragrant magenta ringlets.  The snoring of sun guardians comes from the dinner table. 

            Sakura runs toward Yue. She kisses him on the lips and then hugs him. "I need you."

            There is nothing but love in his eyes. "As do I," he says. He holds her, cradling her thin soft self, feeling her doe-brown hair under his chin. She whispers something in his ear. He lifts her easily, and carries her away. 

            That night she gives him everything Clow never could. She gives him love, hope, bliss, and her innocence—all of which waltz with fear, guilt, regret, shame, and the end of another's innocence…

           When we give into lust all the while plagued with guilt, regret, and the consequences, it is known as a loss of innocence. We may not be children anymore, but a fragment of innocence always lives within us all. It is when it dies that we become aware of its existence.

They taste the hate of omnipresent eyes; as they taste each other's innocence, love. Tainted, they feel that they will never feel/be clean again.

She holds the Return card in her hand, guilt of her fingertips, breathing in fear. His hand holds her hand steadily; he will always be there. She won't yield to his comfort tonight anymore. 

"I need this, I need this…" she pleads. "I won't be able to move on if I don't…" 

"How far will you go back?"

She fingers the Clow key dangling between her breasts. Years of sorcery practice had taught her to do without it. It is worn as a lucky charm, a memory of a Sakura of the past she longs to be again. "Two days." 

Yue looks at himself, his body and shame exposed, not sure of whose innocence was lost in the moment. It was something ineffable and unforgettable, this night. All the same, it was not right.

He lets go of her hand.

There is a final kiss, followed by a breathed word:

"_Return…"_

Thus ends    i n n o c e n c e ' s     w a l t z.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_For better or worse…_

Sakura takes Return. 

"RETURN!"

_I see myself waltzing with Yue. _

_As we waltz, everyone smiles: Touya, Ruby, Tomoyo, and Meiling's fiancé Victor. The ones who are not smiling are Meiling and Syaoran._

****

**The whiskey on your breath**

_Knowing the consequences, I have drunk only once this night and that was when I made a toast to my best friend Tomoyo. May God bless her on this day…_

**Could make a small boy dizzy;**

_He looks so beautiful tonight that I don't want to give away the next dance to Ruby anymore. But he is my guardian… he is mine alone. And that's all I ever want or ask for._

****

**But I hung on like death:**

_Ah, there goes Touya after Syaoran again… He's telling him the third and last promise. I'm glad I don't have to go through with those promises again. _

_The third promise, what was it?_

_'Betray her and you shall pay for it for the rest of your life…' I hold onto Yue tightly; those words give me chills._

**Such waltzing was not easy.**

_He's a good waltzing partner, I tell him. He blushes. How _kawaii_!_

After he makes his last promise to Touya, Syaoran catches his breath at Meiling's table. _The madness never ends, _he thinks, hands on his forehead and the top of his head. He sits down and watches Sakura and Yue waltz. Beside him, his cousin Meiling and her beau feed each other berries dipped in sweet cream. 

Meiling notices him watching the waltzing, and asks: "Does it not bother you that she is waltzing with him and not you?"

"Not at all," Syaoran answers, smiling. "It's just a harmless dance."

_That night plagues me no matter how many times I relive it. There are things that happened that night I feel were acts of selfishness or stupidity. Love is defined by such acts, but I wish I knew who I really love[d] so I'd be absolved from at least one guilt._

_I think heard him say, "I'll be forever by your side," and I remember responding with: "Forever; that's how long I'll need you." _

_Though I do not remember with whom I was speaking to._

_I held the Dream, and gave the other a dream of my love, for I could not give it in reality._

_"I've loved you always," he says to me in the dream._

_"I love you …" I say his name, whatever it was._

_sadness_Desperation_sadness rampages in my mind and soul with its talons, shredding away all dregs of lucidity. The confusion vexes me from the reign of the sun, to the time of the moon, to the last/first play of the stars._

_Which one is _Syaoran_…?…_Yue_?_

_I wish I knew._

_This is the price I pay for love_Magic_love._

_This is the price I paid for a_     w a l t z   _ with    _i n n o c e n c e .

Kinomoto Sakura

The End


	6. CoG: SuppiChan

**_I, I, I_**

* * *

_It's 5:00A.M._ _There's nothing to do, and rather than listen to my sister sing horribly along with the blaring stereo, I evade boredom by climbing the top of the tallest tree I could find._

_ The leaves waver like colorful flags in the wind this morning. My thoughts become too loud, but attempting to refrain one's self from thinking requires even more thinking—which makes no sense altogether. I think that I think too much, don't you think? _

_ So far, with the aid of a sharp twig, I've carved a caricature of Keroberos into the trunk of this tree. The drawing shows up brightly in lime-green, but like all the other ones carved into this tree, will dry to an earthy shade of red. I'm relieved that my hatred for the guardian has developed into art. If only my antipathy for this city could be vented so conveniently... _

_ I dig the twig deeper into the soft part of the trunk, the sponge-like wood beneath the layers of tough bark. It feels good, like all the malignity in this mind is being pressed down into the trunk, infecting it with my anguish. I can feel it shudder as it suppresses its pain, and think of it as you, Tomoeda. _

_ I don't hate you, Tomoeda. Not yet. I simply hate being here. I should be home back in England, relaxing in front of the fireplace, Nakuru somewhere in the library, and our master and Kaho-san exchanging the saccharine looks of lovers. There, I feel like I'm with my family. Here, I feel like I'm living with walking enigmas- enigmas that conform to the forever mysterious you, Tomoeda. And somehow, I blame you for that. _

_ You probably think I'm an egoist, by the number of times I've said "I." Maybe I am. Maybe I'm the embodiment of the letter "I." "I," "I," "I," it is a wonderful letter. The ninth letter of the alphabet, a vowel, and a special letter for it can also be a word. Cats have nine lives. Heh. What a coincidence. "I," "I,", "I,"—don't you just _love_ that word/letter? _

_I, I, I see the branches waving at the moon as it begins to blanch away…_

-When the sun shines down, its light shall drown

_I, I, I spot three birds hopping in unison from branch to branch this way…_

-The moon's face in the heaven's blue; night fades and the stars do, too

_I, I, I watch these ivory-feathered demons, as they gradually grow near…_

-Night, come back and scare them off, sent them to their nest above!

_I, I, I ponder about what to do- should I portray false valor or my true fear?_

_ Those freaking birds! Why are they gawking at me? They gawk as if they knew me. Surely, they can't read my mind, can they? Oh, God, I think I'm becoming paranoid. Still, they draw closer… and closer… and closer… and-_

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"_ I shout at them and flee with their gazes still riveted on me._

_Exhausted, I rest at the front door of the house. The birds are still watching me, studying me, from the branch, and I wonder why. I enter the house and go to my window, where I reclaim my mind's privacy, mute my thoughts, and ponder away. _

_ And all I think about is England… home._

* * *

Confessions of a Guardian: Suppi-chan

* * *

He was walking when all of a sudden, he screamed out in pain. Twitching vehemently on the floor, Spinel Sun looked up to find a long slender leg poised before him. He turned on his back with the human foot still crushing him. _Size five, neon pink toenails… do I smell Vanilla lotion? Naku-_

"What the hell are you doing down there? Are you purposely trying to ruin my pedicure?" Akizuki Nakuru hollered. She wriggled her toes, checking to see if any damage was done to the unscarred, well cared for, petite toes. "Be glad that you're soft, Suppi-chan. Do you know what I'd do if you'd prickled my perfect unblemished skin?"

"Start singing again?" Spinel snapped jeeringly. Nakuru's facial muscles tightened as she increased the pressure on his stomach with the ball of her heel. "I was…just…kidding…." On the verge of suffocation, he bit her gently on the side of the foot.

"Ow!" Nakuru lifted him up and held his tiny plushie-self prisoner in a tightened fist. "What did I say about the flesh! What did I say!"

The cat-like creature bit her again, this time into the fleshy part between the thumb and index finger. The twice-injured teen became wide-eyed, trying to keep from crying out in pain. Giving her younger brother the satisfaction of overpowering the other would only inflate his overly large kitty ego.

"What do you want from me, woman? All I wanted this morning was a drink of water! And have I gotten it yet? Nooo… you had to crush my blissful mood with your GIGANTIC foot!"

"Water? I'll give you water…" Nakuru stepped into the bathroom, tossing her long, dark-brown hair in his face. She filled up his maroon plastic dish with icy water and grinning heinously at her nettled victim, ran after him.

It took about fifteen long seconds for Spinel Sun to figure out what she intended to do with the water-filled dish. _The imbecile's gonna give me a cold shower…_

"Suppi-chan…" she said in a sing-song voice. "Do you still want your water, otootochan?"

The defenseless guardian quivered in fear. "N-No it's all-all right, Nakuru-sama," he whimpered.

"About time you start showing respect, Suppi-chan." Victoriously, she held up her chin and motioned him away with her hand. "Carry on before I change my mind and give that much needed bath." Spinel's face became crestfallen. "Hmm…and you could use a nice make over, too. That face is just begging to be worked on." Nakuru took out the hair spray. He flinched, as she was about to spray on the foul smelling product on his "clean" fur. "That's your cue to run, little kitten."

"AAH!" _Oof! _

"What going on, Spinel-san?" The startled guardian was still seeing stars when his master Eriol peeled him off his chest after foolishly crashing into him.

Regaining his senses, Spinel Sun bowed his head. "I apologize, Eriol-san. The scare was not intentional. It's that Nakuru; she's after my hide again."

"I can hear you…" sung Nakuru from the shower.

Eriol smoothed his jacket with his hands, removing the lint that the guardian had picked up with his paws and had stuck them on his uniform. "Spinel-san, tell me how do I look?"

_You're wearing the same boring uniform like the rest of them. _"Why, like any other school day."

"And how would that be?"

"Err…like a true Tomoeda resident." _Unfortunately._

"Thank you. I'm starting to feel like I've lived in Tomoeda all my life." He flashed one of his avid smiles. "I'll see you at the breakfast table, then, Spinel-san." As he continued on his way to the living room, the sun guardian intervened.

"Eriol-san, before you leave," asked Spinel Sun, "can you transform me into my true form, you know… to keep Nakuru-san away from me?"

"I'm so glad you decided to stay, Eriol-san!" a cheerful Nakuru stated, brushing her hair for the fiftieth time that morning. "I don't what I would've done in England…Um not that Kaho wouldn't be so fun to be with," she added.

Eriol smiled. "But you do you that this is only for a month, right? We can't possibly stay here in Tomoeda forever." The sapphire haired boy sighed, staring out at the window. The city was already busy with the scheduled affairs that gave it its incandescent glow, an attractive aura that Eriol felt deep within himself. There was no denying the forces in this mystical place, but his time here was done. A worthy successor and a friend would watch over this paradise and the rest of the world.

"Do you miss her, Eriol-san?" Spinel Sun questioned. The incarnation of Clow looked down to the winger-panther, marveled by the jeweled butterfly on the furred chest. He bent down and found himself face-to-face with a shimmering jade that reflected his saddened face in its polished body. Gazing into the green reflection, Eriol petted his caring creation.

Spinel grew uneasy beneath his touch. "I'm sorry if my question was too personal, Eriol-san."

"It's all right, Spinel-san." The boy stood up, slapping off the black hairs that stuck to his hands. "You need not to worry about me…or her. I'm pretty sure she's found a job to keep herself busy 'til we go back." _Promise me you'll remember to write, Kaho, and everything will fall into place…_

"Why did you decide to stay, anyway?" Eriol was once again in the spotlight.

"I guess I wanted a formal farewell. After putting these people through deceit, danger, and manipulations, they deserve our fidelity, don't you agree?" The two guardians nodded. "We've met many people here, and not just me. You two have made a fan base out of normal citizens- especially you, Nakuru."

Nakuru blushed. "I know, I know. I just can't help being popular!" Proudly, she admired herself in the magnetic mirror pinned on the refrigerator door. "I'm just so darn cuuute!"

"If you're so _darn _cute, then why do you still stalk your men?" She glared at Spinel. "What's the matter, Nakuru-_sama_? Snow bunny giving you the run for the money?"

"I warned you!" Nakuru cried out, threatening the sun guardian with a butter knife.

Eriol sat down at the table, beginning to dislike the hostility between siblings. "Enough, you two. It's barely seven o' clock in the morning and you two are already quarreling."

"My apologies, Eriol-san." Nakuru bowed and Spinel plumped down on the cold floor. She poured him a glass of orange juice and placed the bowl of cereal and milk before him. If she hadn't taken so long to fix her hair, she would have made sunny-side up eggs and fried sausages for Eriol. "Sorry for the breakfast this morning. I hadn't the time to shop in the last few days," she lied.

"I don't mind eating anything you serve me, Nakuru. Just as long as we get to eat together as a family." He offered the seat next to her and placed two clean bowls on the table, one for her and one for the antagonistic guardian that sulked in the corner.

"Thank you." She took the seat and sat down, shooting the panther an arrogant smile.

Spinel Sun had either ignored or not noticed the friendly gesture, for he was still brooding in his corner like a punished child.

"Spinel-san, are you not hungry?" His ears stood up and the wiry whiskers fanned out, an indication that he was.

"I can't eat sweetened cereal, but the plain milk will do just fine."

"Oh, don't worry. There's no sugar in…" He read the front of the tangerine-orange cardboard box. "Kix."

"Really? Great! Nakuru, can you please serve me some?" he asked, rubbing his head on her lap.

Nakuru nudged him away from her pleated uniform skirt. "Fine."

Upon seeing the large bowl of milk and crunchy cereal, the panther transformed back into the endearing plushie and dived into the white pool of his breakfast.

"This is sooo good!" The munching and splashing continued.

"I'm not cleaning THAT up," Nakuru declared.

Eriol guffawed. "The table or Spinel?"

With a magenta-tipped finger, she pointed to the soaked creature prancing in the ceramic bowl. "That."

"All right, It's time for us to go to school." Eriol opened the front door in hopes of catching Nakuru's attention. She was busy dabbing more raspberry lip-gloss and smacking her lips. Noticing his attention fixed on her, she smiled and offered some to him. "No, thanks. Nakuru-san, we're going to be late, _again_, if you don't speed up with your beauty touch-up."

"Oh, you worry too much, Eriol-san! And even if we're late, which we are not, we can always zap ourselves into school. Not only would it be faster, but we wouldn't break a sweat running through mazes of traffic and children."

Spinel Sun joined her in the mirror. He began sniffing the tiny fruit-scented containers. "Eww… they're all sweet, I bet."

"No, duh! Here try this one." Nakuru said, placing a French-white one in front of him. "It's coconut. It's nutty instead of sweet."

The curious black plushie pressed a paw on the waxy translucent substance. Making a strange face, he shook his digit-less limb, trying to free himself of the funny-looking blob on it. "It's outright revolting, Nakuru. How can you put this… this crap on your face?"

"Ha ha! If you don't want to touch it, eat it or wipe it off." Spinel made a gagging sound.

Eriol glanced at his watch and gasped. "Nakuru! We're late!"

Nakuru shrieked. "Oh, no! Just let me get my bag, and we'll be on our way!"

She found the brown leather backpack sitting atop the bookcase, too high for her to reach without a chair. The chair would have to be dragged in from the parlor and time would be wasted in the process. She turned to the sun guardian, who was admiring himself in the mirror. "Suppi-chan, a little help, please?"

"Certainly." _If it gets you out of the house..._ He zoomed up to the top and dropped the bag into the girl's arms.

"That's why I love you, otootochan. You can be so sweet when you want to." She blew him a kiss before departing with Eriol.

_Love me? That's the first time she's said that to me! _He emitted a small groan. _Kinda makes me feel sorry for wiping my paw on her backpack… Kinda. _

Spinel Sun transfixed his turquoise eyes on the running figures. _"Slow down, Eriol-san!" I can't run that fast!" _the female one boy with the short blue hair and silver-rimmed glasses looked back at the slow-walking brunette._ "Nakuru-san, isn't that Touya over there?"_ he inquired, pointing to another road. Shrieking in delight, the girl broke the sound barrier at the mentioned name. She grabbed the smaller one, sped up, and at last, disappeared around a corner.

Surrounded by silence, the lonely guardian made an effort to search for them. Puddle footprints were left behind. Piecemeal, they vanish slowly as the sun evaporated last night's rainwater- one by one, the last trace of life that had originated from the house became a memory.

_By Clow, it's quiet,_ he thought. He had been wishing for some privacy so he could resume napping, yet once he acquired it, it seemed… _too quiet. _

-_Silence is not as garrulous as Nakuru-san. I think… I think I'm starting to m-miss her!_

-_Get a hold of yourself, Spinel Sun! She has been bothering you all morning. Why in Clow's name would you want the talkative pest here?_

_ -You're right… But still, nobody wants to be lonely…_

_ -You got me, your confiding conscience!_

_ -Hmm… before I bring myself into another conversation, I'll retain the rest of my sanity and go to sleep instead. _

_ -You're always shutting me out, Spinel Sun. That's why you're still in this plush—_

_ -Good night!_

He began contemplating whether he should attempt to doze off until they returned or die out of boredom. _Strange_,he thought, _why can't I think clearly without you, Nakuru-san? Why don't I feel strong sans you, Eriol-san? Why? _

_I want you two with me, not out there… not in Tomoeda. _

_ I want to be home… in England with Kaho. That's where home is. Not here… not ever…_

The morning's vivacity suffered a defeat with the loss of the head and the heart of the house. Eriol was the thinker, cogitating over solutions, strategies, and decisions. Nakuru, the heart, never ceasing to brighten up the day with her endless quantity of charms and innocuous trickery. _Alas, Tomoeda has engulfed them._ He knew it, and as he climbed down the windowsill to his marmalade-purple sofa, he uttered three barely audible words…

"I hate Tomoeda."

The glare from the window grew increasingly annoying, boring down on the imported violet divan like fiery arrows. Spinel Sun's head drooped over the edge of the couch nicked "Spinel Sun's sleep-inducing divan." No creature, guardian, mortal or otherwise, could resist dozing off after resting upon it. Half an hour, tops, did they either stand up and swap seats with someone or take a nap. Nakuru would devour a novel or two but would always fall victim to "Suppi-chan's cursed couch."

He opened one eye, expecting well-known darkness brought with the night to have transpired over Tomoeda. _It's still early, how dreadful._ Spinel Sun yawned lazily and sat up. His enlarged pupils thinned to mere jet-black slits, and his eyes were anew, two verdant spheres beaming with animation.

_"Good morning, Spinel Sun," _a voice said.

Spinel, alarmed, looked around the room. Sitting in Master Eriol's chair was a young boy. He wore a deep cerulean blue robe accented with gold bands running vertically down the front and collar and a necklace composed of a thin gold chain with amethyst stones set into the gold.

His eyebrows were two, dark auburn slashes an inch above the eyes-an abysmal blue and like the sky; they could put you in a trance if you bore too long into them. Spinel was stargazing at the very moment, mouth dry and partly open, revealing two tiny sharp ivory-colored fangs.

The miniature cat noticed his sudden discomposure and shut his mouth. This boy… he had magic. Spinel Sun had sensed it immediately, but it was benign sort of magic, weaker than his. The type of magic found in young wizards and sorcerers, who studied, struggling to maintain their feeble powers, and learned to increase them through magic books and enchanted spells. _Yes._ He could overpower this one… then why was he petrified?

_-He is weak, Spinel Sun. Don't let him scare you like that. _

_-I'm not scared!_

_-Then why don't you teach this little intruder a lesson?_

_-What do you want me to do-? Bite the kid? _

_-You have a charming sense of humor, Spinel Sun. If this "sun guardian" charade doesn't work out, make sure to give stand-up comedy a shot._

_-_ _That's it! I'm not speaking to myself, for the rest of the day! _

_-…_

The boy sat confidently as if he was enjoying the scare he had given the sun guardian. "Don't be alarmed, Spinel-san," he said smiling. "This isn't even our first meeting." The guarding blinked in bewilderment. "Don't I seem familiar to you?"

"Yes."

"Then, who do I remind you of?"

_You look like—Clow Reed? _"Are you related to Clow Reed?" he asked the boy whose face seemed to shift to an older version of the sorcerer.

"More than related," the boy responded. "I am he."

"Clow Reed? You're the famous Clow Reed! What are you doing here? Oh, who cares? The master is going to be pleased!" He jumped into his lap and went right through his body, crashing face-first into the back of the chair. The thick flocculent back of the chair softened his impact and sent him bouncing back to the seat cushion. Shaking off the remains of shock, he peeked upwards, blinded by the dark blue haze that made up Clow Reed's interior. _He's a g-ghost?_

"Spinel, I won't be here for the whole day." He stood up, leaving the guardian the chair. "In fact, I'm not actually here at all," he said.

"B-but how?"

"Do you really want to know? Or would you rather help me find something fun to do in this city? I'm bored already." That was all the proof Spinel Sun needed. This was indeed Clow Reed.

_This will be a great opportunity to get back at Nakuru and "her Touya-chan." _Spinel smiled. He had been touched by her sweet farewell but a feline never forgets; she had tried to give him an icy shower. "I think I know where to find entertainment, Clow-sama."

Kinomoto Touya appeared to be in his own world as he painstakingly chained his bicycle to the bicycle rack. His fingers treated the silver chains like silk laces, slowly and gently looping it around the rack and his bicycle's beams.

"Hi, everybody!" It was that voice. The nerve-racking voice he couldn't get out of his head. _Her name…what was it?_ He shrugged inwardly. At least, he wouldn't feel guilty about snubbing the brunette. She was practically another nameless faceless stranger at his school, seeking popularity through cliques.

He turned around. _God,_ she was getting closer. She, the familiar-yet-unfamiliar and definitely vexing girl, was drawing closer, but not close enough to spot the tall raven-haired teen meticulously attending to his bicycle. The little fame he attained around campus had to do with him being girlfriend-less and such a pro at sports, yet the attention wasn't always good for Touya.

A throng of cheerleaders was walking (more like prancing) towards him, to his disenchantment. He had been discovered and now, faced numerous giggling girls, their true faces lost in their excessive make-up.

A blonde with the makings of a femme fatale hugged him. "Touya-san," she chirped into his shoulder, "how we've missed you!" He gritted his teeth, paying no heed to what she had said. After several laconic re-introductions and exchanges of conversations, he was able to dodge them without seeming anxious to leave and while maintaining his disposition.

Touya let out a deep sigh. _That's the last time I join any sport team…_

"Touya-kun!"

"Huh?" Touya turned around to come across Akizuki Nakuru beamed hungrily at him, holding her textbooks against her chest. "Um…hi, uh…"

"It's Akizuki Nakuru." She feigned a frown. "Touya-kun, how is it that you can never remember my name?"

"It's you, you're the girl who's always getting in my way!" She nodded.

The brunette leaned closer to him, whispering in his ear: "It's because you want me near, don't you, To-ya?"

Touya stepped back, as if her sultry breath against his skin would melt him. "You're not allowed to call me that... _Akizuki-san_. And weren't you supposed to go back to New Zealand or something?"

"England," she corrected him. "And no, we're not going back, yet. I'll get to stay with you and _that _friend of yours longer! Isn't it great?"

_God, it's hard to believe that someone like _that_ has magical powers…_ A bell rang in the background, and students began rushing into the school doors and into their first period classes.

"Touya-kun?" she timidly asked. Touya turned to the girl. "We're going to be late for French class."

"'_We'_? Since when do _you_ have French class?" he asked in incredulity.

Balancing the textbooks in one arm, Nakuru managed to take out a folded piece of paper from the pocket of her sky-blue jacket. "Since today," she said, handing him the paper. "I wanted to be in all of your classes just until we leave."

_But the whole reason why I got into French class was to get away from you_, he thought miserably. "Nakuru-san, why do you bother?"

"Bother what?"

"Why do you insist on following me around? The Sakura cards have been sealed and signed, Sakura-chan has passed the test, and her guardians and I are here for her… So why hang around?"

She bit her lower lip. "Touya-kun, I'm not interested in any of that."

"Then why?"

"I-I like you. I've grown to like you as a friend…" _…and even more_, she added mentally. "I know it's weird, but it's true, Touya-kun. I've grown fond of many Tomoeda residents, but it's you who I really enjoy being around." She crimsoned as she said the last phrase.

_Jesus_, Touya thought, _I think she loves me. _He bowed his head and closed his eyes. _I can't say anything to hurt her… but she has to know that I don't feel the same way. _ "Naku-" His confession was cut short by the unforeseen kiss.

She kissed him yearningly, her tongue thrusting into his closed lips. His mouth weakened and for a second, she felt the kiss being returned… or was it? "Nakuru-san, what are you doing?" he asked, avoiding being softened by her sudden affectionate behavior.

Nakuru proceeded on kissing him, and in between kisses, she answered: "I can't stop it, To-ya. It's not me…" She dropped her textbooks and wound her arms around his neck, granting more intimacy.

"To-ya, Nakuru-san, what's going on here?" interrupted Tukisiro Yukito, who had rode in late on his bicycle. With chestnut-brown eyes wide, he gawked at the two in astonishment.

"Yuki," Touya said, breaking free of Nakuru, "what are you doing here? I thought you felt sick today…"

"I did," he replied, his voice reverberating with despondency. He finished chaining his bicycle to the rack and advanced to the school entrance. "I guess I'll see you two later," he said, without looking back at them.

"Yuki, wait!" Touya called. He ran towards him and placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him. While they were conversing, Nakuru watched with her mouth agape.

_What the _hell _happened here?_ _Why did I kiss him?_ She sighed when she saw the two best friends enter the school without a word of farewell.

Picking up her textbooks, Nakuru heard the faint sound of maniacal laughter. Shrugging off the echoes of laughter, she noticed a small figure sitting atop a branch of the peach tree planted in front of the school. From where she stood, it looked like a normal black kitten, if not for the mirth it emitted. _Suppi-chan?_

A scowl crossed her face when she realized that it was her sibling cackling like a lunatic after watching her make a spectacle of herself. "Suppi-chan!" she screamed, running towards the tree, tossing books at him. Her algebra book managed to strike him squarely in the forehead, knocking him down instantaneously. Nakuru grabbed him by the neck and shook him fiercely.

"I'll **fucking** kill you!" she spat through clenched teeth.

He bit her and flew up on a high branch. "Will you really? You seemed to enjoy showing _your_ To-ya how much you love him, Nakuru-san."

"Don't you dare come near me or Touya-kun again, _ever!_" the fuming Nakuru hollered, pointing at the sun guardian. "I swear I'll _kill_ you, if you do!"

Laughing, he gracefully flew out of her grasp and sight. Nakuru watched the cerulean sky absorb the guardian in its touch. He dematerialized into fine gold powder, and even that disappeared in the sun's superfluity of light.

_How-?_ The clandestinely asked question soon slid into the corners of her mind. There were too many things she did not know about her brother, for her to begin wondering how and why.

He was simply Suppi-chan…

"I don't see what was so hilarious about that, Spinel Sun," the child who claimed to be Clow Reed said. He had grimaced throughout the whole kissing scene while Spinel had roared in laugher, causing the tree to shake violently.

"Are you kidding me? It was funny as hell!" The plushie slapped the sorcerer in the back. "Congratulations, Clow-sama. You are a better joker than Eriol-san."

"You thought of it as a joke? It was downright cruel! She's your sister—she's your _only _sister!"

"Don't remind me." He laughed. "We should team up against that horrid Kero-_chan_!" Spinel suggested mocking the name Sakura had given to the sun guardian. "That's if you don't mind torturing your own guardian, do you, Clow-sama?"

"I'd be digging you a grave, if it wasn't partially my fault!" The boy cradled his face in his palms, rubbing his temples with the tip of his fingers. "This is not my idea of a good time…"

Spinel Sun rested on Clow Reed's chair, leaving the boy his purple sofa for him to wallow up in self-pity. The guardian sighed contentedly. "I haven't laughed that much since the day Keroberos got blamed for eating all of the pastries at the bake sale. Even if you didn't like the joke, I have to thank you for allowing me to experience something close to bliss."

"Besides ignorance, Spinel Sun?" Young Clow Reed looked up, expecting to see a sardonic grin on the guardian's face, but instead saw a beatific smile directed at him.

"Ah, but _for much wisdom is much grief; and he that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow_." The smile incomparable to a saint's became twisted. "I've been drowning in grief, for the last couple of days, Clow-sama. I've come to know this damn city more than I wanted to. If it wasn't for today, I would have swallowed a teaspoon of sugar just to see if there was still life in this plush body."

"What are you blathering about? Tomoeda is a beautiful place."

"England is lovelier."

Clow Reed stretched out on the sofa, placing his head on a velvety deep-violet cushion and his legs on the other end of the sofa. "I think you're hiding something, Spinel- _san_. You _do_ like Tomoeda, just that you have a hard time showing it. It's tearing you up from the inside, slowly driving you insane… becoming even more difficult for you to deny…"

"If I need some pseudo-psychiatrist to diagnose me insane, I'll tell you. But for now, don't try to mar me with that bullshit, Clow Reed."

The sorcerer laughed nonchalantly. "What happened to 'Clow-sama?' I was finally feeling respected by a guardian. Now, you're like my bad-mouthing sun guardian, sans the pudding obsession."

"Kero-chan? Ugh… please forgive me, Clow-sama, then," Spinel joked.

"Spinel-san… when was the last time you told your sister you loved her?" the sorcerer asked out the blue.

"I-I… um—hey, wait! Didn't I say to stop nagging about what I did to Nakuru-san?"

He shook his head. "No, you told me to stop bothering you about Tomoeda. So, answer me. Do you love her? And if so, does _she_ know?"

"I-I'm not sure…" Spinel answered, glancing around the room in a vain effort to cover up his lie. There was a framed picture of all four of them –Eriol, Kaho, Nakuru and he— placed amongst old leather-bound books with some of their unevenly cut pages sticking out. His sister was dressed in vivid red, making her shapely figure appear ablaze. One of the gold star buttons of her blouse was missing. Knowing the exact whereabouts of the lost button, Spinel groaned in guilt. "I believe she doesn't."

"Tell her. You might never know what can happen, and we all need to be reminded that there's someone who cares nearby, even if _he_ can be cruel sometimes."

"And why are you acting like some damn sage, now, Clow-sama?"

"I-I used to love someone, but never told hi-_her_," Clow Reed responded, standing up. He yawned and walked up the sun guardian. "Mind if we trade places? Your couch was making me drowsy."

_I wonder whom he loved…_ "Clow-sama?" Spinel asked, leaving him the chair.

"Yes."

"Who did you love?"

Again, the sorcerer yawned. "Maybe we can talk about it after a nap. Your couch's charm hasn't worn off."

Spinel yawned, as well. "I think I'll take a nap, too."

"Good night, then."

"'Night." He saw the sorcerer close his eyelids and fold his hands in his lap. Before going to sleep, Spinel Sun took a one last glimpse of Tomoeda from the windowsill above his couch. The sun had swallowed Tomoeda in its radiance, giving the town a divine gold tint.

_He never told me just how beautiful it was…_

"Otootochan, this is no time to be lazing around!" Spinel Sun's eyes flung open to meet with Ruby Moon's fuchsia glower.

He yawned and stretched out. "What are _you _doing here and in that form?"

"Speak for yourself, otootochan." Spinel Sun gazed down at himself. _No wonder the sofa felt so small! _He was now in his true form, a handsome sable panther with colossal butterfly wings spotted with jade-green.

"I have a message to you from Eriol-san and Daidouji-san," Ruby Moon said.

"What is it?"

"Sakura's birthday, you idiot! Don't tell you forgot."

"I did not!" he shouted back angrily. His eyes roamed about the room, searching, searching…searching for the sorcerer. The chair was empty. Not even the impression he had left on it earlier was there.

"What's wrong?"

"I just have a hunch that he's near."

"Who?"

"Clow-sama… he… he came to visit us and fell asleep in his old chair. " Spinel Sun pointed to the chair. Ruby Moon brushed back her dark crimson bangs, bemused by her brother's claims.

"Either someone slipped some sugar in your milk or you're seeing things, Suppi-chan. There's no one there."

"But he was so real!" _I know you were here, Clow-sama… You spoke to me… you told me to tell her—_

"Nope. Nothing there. Anything else you wanna say before we leave?"

"No, I mean _yes_." He cleared his voice. "Nakuru-chan," the confession commenced, "I want you to know that I… I will do my best to protect Master Eriol-sama and _you, _even if I'm the youngest."

She embraced him. "Thank you, Spinel Sun, though I fail to see the reason behind those words now that the mission is over. But if you ever need back up, I'll be available, otootochan."

"Nakuru-san?" he asked.

"Yes."

"I wanted to apologize for today. It wasn't my intention to turn your To-ya into a misogynist. I-I…well, there's really isn't any excuse."

"It's all right. He likes Yukito-san better than me anyway." _But since that kiss, anything is possible…_

"He doesn't know what he's missing then…" Spinel Sun quipped.

Her face flushed. "Suppi-chan, that's why you're my favorite… _et porquoi je t'aime."_

"What did you say?"

"Forget about it, otootochan."

The two guardians watched the sky darken into deep ebony. The wind howled in, shaking the leaves off the scraggly trees.

"Keroberos, slow down!" someone shouted. It was Yue flying after the golden sun guardian. "I'm sorry, please let me explain how it happened!"

"There's nothing to explain! You did it on purpose, Yue! " Keroberos shouted back at the moon guardian.

The younger one looked up to the taller one -the one with the benighted rubies for eyes and dark wings spotted with red- noticing for the first time, how her beauty had enhanced beneath the wintry glow of the moon. "Are you ready, Nakuru-san?"

Ruby Moon's fuchsia eyes met with his the jade-green of his. No reply was heard, nor was one needed. They took off simultaneously, racing towards the angel-winged guardians.

"Oh no…" muttered Yue as the girl with the long, dark rose hair propelled herself onto him and clung to his waist.

"Did you miss me, lover?" Nakuru asked the captured guardian. He gave her a look of fright, as he struggled to free himself.

The battle had begun. The last thing heard came from the opposing side, from the one with the lithe dove-like wings, silver-white hair reaching down to his feet.

"Keroberos, Help me!"

* * *

**Three Words and Three Muses**

* * *

_"I love you"… three one-syllable words… why couldn't I say that earlier, for you to hear?_

_How I hated myself for not saying what was in my heart… but now it's too late… isn't it, Nakuru-san? _

_I flew by your side, saying nothing, thinking about how Tomoeda had united us. _

_You've grown up a lot, as Ruby Moon, Akizuki __Nakuru, and as a sister. Whatever forms you take, I just want you to know that I love you…_

_Forgive me, Tomoeda. I did not see what you were trying to do all along. Thank you for bringing us closer. We're a family, now and forever. _

_This city… its golden aura, I saw it for the first time today. Indeed, it is beautiful, but England will always be first. You, Tomoeda, shall be second. Tomoeda, my second home. It sounds strange to say "Tomoeda" and "home" in the same sentence, but at least now, I am able to smile when I say those words. _

_Home. Tomoeda. Heh. It is starting to sound normal._

_May you rest in peace, Clow-sama. _

"Dream, I think that for once, you've proven yourself useful," Sleep said, grinning at her sister.

Dream's eyes widened. "For once? I'll give you a nightmare the minute you doze off!"

"What makes you think I'll be the one to doze off first?" the tiny glowing Sakura card snapped back.

"Quiet, you two," Mirror interrupted. "We all worked well together to cheer up Spinel Sun. Why not celebrate?"

"What should we do, then?" asked Dream. "Order Chinese?"

"Can we order some orange chicken? That's my absolute _favoooorite!" _ the Sleep card pleaded.

Dream's face cringed in disgust. "Ugh! _No_ _chicken._ I still feel gross after being trapped in that dirty pigeon's body…" With the help of the Change, the three Sakura cards were able to borrow the bodies of three white pigeons and spy on poor Spinel Sun. Meanwhile, their real bodies were being cages by the Shadow to keep them from flying away and/or from doing other_ "_uncivil" things (like eating out of garbage cans or doing not-so-nice things to parked cars).

Mirror raised her hand, a gesture for her sister to silence. "Don't remind me, _please_."

"Then what?"

The three sisters exchanged blank looks and then, abruptly smiled.

"Sakura's birthday party!" the three shouted at the same instant.

Dream began pacing about Sakura's room. "No, no, no. No!" She threw her hands up in the air. "I bet the others are already partying!"

"Five bucks says that Sweet has gotten her sugary hands on the cake by now," Sleep said.

"You're on!" Mirror took out a wad of three one-dollar bills and a necklace made of plastic light purple beads secured together with a gold-colored string. "Um… will the necklace be okay?" Sleep nodded. "All right, Let's go, then. It's not that often Sonomi-sama isn't there to see us."

They flew out the window, leaving poor Dream searching for the perfect party dress.

Dream walked up where the two had been chatting, holding two identical black dresses. "Which one's the cutest?"

A few stars twinkled as if in response. The window had been carelessly thrust opened, allowing several leaves to flutter in with the breeze.

_"Hello?"_


End file.
